Love + Conflict

When C was L's age, I would lay down on the floor with her almost everyday and take pictures of her.

(The way I like to photograph is to just sit, watch and snap.  I like to just BE with my kids, watching them DO their thing in their environment.  I stay on their level and I just snap what I SEE! I like to stay away from forced poses and props and shoot for their true, authentic selves.)

This is when I realized how much I love photography with all my heart and soul.

These moments with her are some of my most memorable.  They were quiet and would last until she was pretty much done and ready to get off the floor and move on to something else.  And, not to mention, it was calming and peaceful for me.

Now that I have L, it's SO much more difficult to have this quality with him and my camera.

I LOVE being able to capture both of my kiddos now, but sometimes I wish I could just get some alone time with L so I can capture the same 'age' moments like I did with C.

Like here....

When she was 6 months old I was able to capture the moments when her feet were the most awesome thing ever, which melted my heart to pieces. 

The other day, C was outside playing in the sprinkler while D was working on the yard.

L woke up from his nap and while I was changing his diaper, I thought, "Ooooo...we're ALONE!!  Perfect!!"

He was happy and didn't seem ready to eat.

I grabbed my DSLR (because these days my iPhone gets more love, which I'm SO grateful to have, but there's nothing like pulling out another love of your DSLR!!) and began to set up the same type of pictures I got of C above.

Except I totally forgot to change my lens...this was taken with my 50mm and I wanted my 35mm on (but I absolutely LOVE my 35mm lens and pretty use it all the time!) but, that's OK.  I blame that on my mama brain. :)

I was in heaven!!I think he was, too! He's not used to NOT having his big sis all over him when I have my camera out. ;)

Then, not even 5 minutes later, C comes into the house CRYING and IMMEDIATELY finds us in her room.  (I tried to lock the door to get some added, yeah, didn't work!  lol.)

I tend to her, quickly, trying to calm her down and then while she's putting on her dry clothes, I snap L again...quickly.

But, I'm struggling because now all L wants to do is watch C cry while she's changing her clothes.

I do my best to use all my fun noises to grab his attention.

But C is still crying and just needing her mama.  SO I stop again, snap again.  Stop again, snap again.

I'm frazzled.  This trying to do what I love while taking care of my littles is HARD!!

Then I notice L is about to sneeze and I SO wanna capture this because he has made the sweetest noise after he sneezes from the second he was born and I ALWAYS want to remember it, so I stop everything and CLICK!

Even though C was still TODDLER MAD, I was trying to my hardest to stay connected to my MAMA-LOVES-TO-TAKE-PICTURES moment, because once I get on a I-LOVE-TAKING-PICTURES-ROLE I can't stop...well, the only way I do is when they're BOTH crying because it's time to eat or someone needs to change their clothes or diapers.

And, yes, this happened about 5 minutes later.

But, before BOTH meltdowns occurred, I got C to join in on the fun with us for a minute or so, and like ALWAYS, even during her VERY upset moment, she gave L the sweetest kiss.  (I'm pretty sure Lil Bro gets the most LOVE outta anyone in the house. :) )

Even though SO many conflicts arise and I feel oh-so flustered EVERY time I find a quick moment to do something I LOVE... I always...ALWAYS seem to get a few really great shots (of food, or a few paragraphs read in my favorite book, or a moment to myself outside on the patio), which always...ALWAYS surprises me!

I realized it's because I absolutely LOVE what I'm doing.

What I know for sure, when you're motivated by your inner most passions, you do find the time to pursue it, frazzled and all.

Even if they're NOT the exact same poses I had in mind before starting (and it ALWAYS works this way too...that's why you can't think ahead of just gotta DO because it's during the DOING when the magic happens!) him grabbing his sweet toes like C did when she was his age.

I'm SO very pleased with what I captured and I was left feeling very happy and excited that I was able to connect with what I love and capture these sweet faces of L (and C, too!), which then, made me a happier mama the rest of the day.

OH and I did end up getting one comparison shot!!

Woohoo!!! I was SO excited about that!!

Are they siblings, or what??? :)

So, tell me...

Can you relate to this?  Or am I the only one who will push through the crying and continue to do something that lights me up until the very last second I get before having to stop and take care of the needs of others because these little 'do what you love' moments don't come up that often when you have little kiddos to take care of ? :) 

Until next time..

Life IS what you love...SAVOR it!