I'm a Mama of Two!
About 6 months ago, I became a mama of two! I can't believe it's been that long since I've blogged, too!
I'll admit, when I first found out I was pregnant with #2, I freaked out! SO many thoughts came into my head that I never had even thought about before. I mean, before, I always thought about the awesomeness of having more than one kid.
But once finding out I was pregnant with #2 and there was no turning back, my thoughts went to, "OMG!! How am I going to deal with sibling fighting and do I really wanna deal with it??? Can I handle it?"
Oh, and how could I forget the thought of not giving enough of me to #1 with #2 here with us and how that made me feel oh-so sad.
Since I was little, I always knew I wanted to be a mother. I'm an only child and I always said I wanted to have 4 or 5 kids.
After having C my mind started thinking that maybe just one would be best. And, I really didn't want to do the whole pregnant thing again (since it took about 2 years to start feeling like my old self again).
But then, my gut, my heart, would say, "You know you wanna have another, Renee!" And, again, my mind would say, "I live a military spouse lifestyle...we're far away from friends and family...raising my daughter is already hard enough on my "me" time...do I want to add another to the mix?"
But, again, my heart and gut, knew what I really wanted...another child. A sibling for my daughter...something I never had.
It was truly a mind-heart roller coaster ride since C was born.
Well, I'm happy to report, almost 6 months after having my baby boy...my 2nd child...that I'm SO happy I listened to my heart, rather than my mind and my fears.
After an eventful ride...Hurricane Isaac had us evacuated to my hometown in Florida since my due date was the day the hurricane was predicted to land in our area...my little guy was born on August 29th...3 days before his due date.
Evacuating and preparing for storms isn't new to us. Growing up in south Florida, hurricanes are the way of life.
While living on Guam, many typhoons came our way, which we were lucky they weren't huge storms while there. And, we even had to evacuate Key West for our wedding/reception with friends and family (after waiting a year after we married legally to have and had to wait another year to have again).
Baby boy has become another hurricane story in our family. :)
Even though the situation was stressful (trying to pack while almost 39 weeks pregnant with a toddler and my parents was really hard and not to mention all the stops we had to make so I could use the potty and give my feet some movement so they wouldn't get too swollen) I was SO happy to be delivering baby boy in my hometown.
Everything worked out beautifully! We left on a Sunday. Got to Florida on Monday. Got situated with the hospital that my cousin is a Labor and Delivery nurse at on Tuesday. Started labor around 11 am on Wednesday. Spent the day in labor. Started to get ready push at 7:00 pm, the exact time my cousin started work. And he was born at 7:32 pm with the help of my cousin!
He's truly the most laid back baby and I'm SO, SO grateful for that!
When big sis saw him for the first time, she just looked at him and said, "L is out!" and then went back to what she was doing.
It took her a week to touch him...only looks. :) But, my fears of her being upset at us, at him and just having lots of meltdowns were non-existent (which may have been helped with having family around for about a month). I was SO relieved. It was my biggest worry of all.
I've spent the last 5 and 1/2 months just soaking all of this in and trying to take care of myself as much as I can. Baby boy is a cat napper during the day and big sister doesn't nap at all, so my hands are full and I go right to bed once they're asleep for the night.
Yes, I'm exhausted. Yes, I'm very sleep deprived and, yes, I'm wishing for more "me" time, but in the end, watching the love between my daughter and my son grow, always, always melts my heart and always, always reminds me of how grateful I've been blessed to be a mother of two.
When I watch my daughter shower her brother with kisses, laugh with him, show him her toys and now wanting to feed him and sit by him at the table, my heart melts and I couldn't be more happy with my choice to try for another! I can't imagine my sweet, sweet boy not here with us.
And, not to mention, he's brought me even closer to my heart desires too (just like his sister did!), but now I owe it all to him to finally taking action on it.
If you're reading this here on my actual website, you may have notice that I've switched things up again!
I'll write more about this later on, but what it all comes down to, really, is that I've wanted to share my love for photography on a blog - a place that I can share my learning as I aspire to be a professional photography...a place to inspire others to slow down with their camera and savor what life has to offer...but I've been too scared...mainly because it's something that comes from deep within me and I didn't want to fail at it I guess...since I've switched my path so many times.
I actually set a blog for this right after C was born, too, but never actually wrote on it or shared my photos in this way.
Now that I've had baby boy, I've never been so ready to finally pursue what I absolutely love. I also realized that I have to start filling up my cup more than ever now that my time is very, very limited.
I have to only do things that light me up from within and make me feel ALIVE and HAPPY, because, honestly, this is a must that I want to model to my kids so they grow up always aligned with their passions and don't go on this long path I've been on to reconnecting with them.
I've written a new about me page which truly explains why I take the photos that I do.
Thanks for sticking around (and if you'd rather not read anymore, that's fine, too!) and I hope you enjoy the inspiration that I have in store here - savoring life through the lens...family...kids...food...life! :)
So, if you have any inner gut...inner heart desires...and you're not sure about listening to them and taking action on them because your mind tells you otherwise or fills you up with fears, maybe my story can be an inspiration to you that your heart never lies. :)