feel your flow

Ever since I began to doodle to calm my mind (FYI...doodling and mediation create the same calming bran waves!! oh yeah!! this IS why I doodle!) I've started to connect more with my inner (guide) feelings. 

I like to call my inner (guide) feelings my intuition.  And this is something I feel in my gut and all throughout my body, not just my heart. 

Before I revived my inner doodler once becoming a mom, I was connected to my to how I felt within, but, I was way more focused on everything outside of myself and was living my life guided by how I was thinking, instead of how I was feeling, which caused a lot of anxiousness to fill me. 

Now, if something FEELS awesome, I know I'm feeling my flow because I FEEL expansive, light, uplifted and good. 

If something doesn't FEEL awesome, I know my flow is being blocked because I feel tight, constricted and NOT good. 

Like, for instance, when we first moved the area we were recommended, through my hubs work forum, about a Pediatrician's Office for C...when first went, it felt OK.  I missed our past doctor's office and the way they were organized and how they made me feel.

The more we went, the more C cried and the more I felt the place wasn't right, especially when you walk in and the people at the front desk don't even look up at you and greet you.  

I wanted to leave, but my mind said...

 "no, just stay...we just moved here, it takes time, and I really don't want to switch and start all over again." 

It wasn't until our last visit, for C's three year check up and I was days away from birthing baby bro, that the doctor's words to me and the way she made C feel didn't sit right with me at all.  My mother was with us and she knew it wasn't right either.  

A few days later, we evacuated to south Florida (my hometown!) because of Hurricane Isaac, where I birthed baby bro and where we were given the most amazing Pediatrician and office (I had NO choice in choosing his doctor).  

I LOVED the doctor (she brought me comfort and she was SO peaceful and easy to talk to and SO great and gentle with baby bro!) and I LOVED the office and how organized they were. 

I realized it was that FEEL GOOD feeling that this new doctor brought deep within me that had me finally saying, "we're finding a new children's doctor ASAP when we get back!"

Because everything felt right and flowed beautifully while we were down there with the doctors (doctors we didn't even know or ask to be signed up with)  helped me to finally SEE (and FEEL) how the current Pediatrician we chose back in our area was making all of us FEEL awful, uncomfortable and uneasy and that it's SO very important to make choices based on these FEELINGS!! 

I needed these feelings (the good ones AND the bad ones!!) to continue to grow within me so I could be finally BE guided to making the best, feel good, choice for our family. 

And now, still in the same area, we have the most amazing Pediatrician (who makes all of us feel SO, SO good and C no longer cries with and, one where I feel SO comforted in her presence) and an office that is organized and also makes me feel good!! 

It took me quite some time to make this switch (2 years!),  but I also wasn't doodling when we first moved here.  I started a few months after, which was the start to following my inner, feel good, guide. 

But, still, it's amazing how the mind rules how we truly FEEL within.  

I mean, don't get me wrong. We need our mind and our thoughts to make choices, but we also need to check in with how we FEEL about those thoughts.  They need to be balanced so we can make the best decisions for us!  I was making decisions based only on what my mind thought and I was ignoring how I felt deep, within my gut.  

And now I know, if it doesn't FEEL good, do something to make sure it does!! 

My mind still loves to get in the way and still loves to pull me into doubt, worry and frustration, but, from what I'm starting to know for myself, is that I need to FEEL those feelings (good and bad!) to remind myself to stay on the course to what beautifully flows for me. 

Because it's that flow that keeps me connected to my intuition (my gut instinct!) am to making decisions that keep me connected to what FEELS best for me and my family.

And, not to mention WHO I am and what I LOVE. 

Something I could have never become aware of if creativity didn't find me! 

And, trust me, every day I'm telling myself....

 "follow your flow, Renee...follow your flow,"

because I can still FEEL anxious and worried and frustrated while my days are filled with the demands of motherhood and all the external thoughts of the world that surround me.  

Because, yeah, it can be really hard for me stay connected to my FLOW while taking care of my kiddos and living in this technology driven, social media filled, everyone sharing their thoughts, world we live in, right!? 

Until next time...

Get YOUR creative calm on...because it easily calms the mind and soothes the soul so when choices in life need to be made YOU can connect within and choose the direction that FEELS and  flows the best for YOU!